Well do you? I am going to guess your initial answer was “YES I DO!” followed immediately by..”I wish, I have so much to do.. work, home, family, friends, school, social obligations, oh well I should check facebook, oh Halloween is coming up, I need to decorate..” How right am I? Well ok, it may have been a bit different if you are a man but essentially you made excuses as to why you can’t right now. I am like you. I have a million and one excuses why I don’t have the time to take care of myself. Just me, myself and I. However, I am learning that it is a faulty mechanism to take care of everything BUT yourself.
We have all read about burn outs in the job but have you ever been burnt out at home? When you sacrifice yourself for your family and it ends up not being beneficial to anyone because you are so tired and stressed that everyone can tell you become snappy and in the end nothing has been accomplished? I know a lot (including myself) that has happened to but we are too proud to admit that oh hey, we have needs too. It is so hard to say, yes I deserve a break, because we immediately think of other people who do more and more “important” things than us and who don’t get breaks so what entitles us to one.
So, after much thought and feeling guilty I have decided that yes, you and I do deserve a break. Everyone does and everyone should indulge in them. Not only are they good for the soul, they also recharge energy and creativity! I am also sure you know this already. I for one took a mini vacation a couple of weeks ago. Just me, no kids, no husband. I felt guilty, how can I not, they stayed home while I had quiet time. I got to see new and exciting things, take pictures, eat yummy food and sit by the ocean at night looking for seashells.
However, it was long overdue. I felt great! It doesn’t mean I don’t love my kids or my husband. It means I love myself too and realized I need to take care of me too in order to be the best I can. We need to learn to love ourselves and care for us as much as we care for those we love. I told my husband to go on a vacation, have a man date or go hunting. We feel obligated to commit to our families fully and I think we lose ourselves in that. I am not saying there shouldn’t be unity, I am saying the individuals should not get lost in the pursuit of a happy family. Are you single? That goes for you as well. You are probably busy with your job, social calls, networking and so on. Do you take time for just yourself? I am not talking about watching TV at home. I mean do you take time to truly rest and care for yourself. Where you can recharge and clear your mind of the everyday stresses. Go on a vacation.
I for one am not the most social person. I have limited friends and I am very comfortable at home with my family. Yet, I feel it was important for me to go outside of my comfort zone and challenge myself. I don’t do well in new situations with people I don’t know. I tick. I count and move my fingers and I guess I sport a deer in the headlight look. Still I went to a resort (huge) and I truly enjoyed myself. I found it oddly relaxing and fun (aside from the evil seagull that took a big dump on my purse). I haven’t had a “vacation” in 6 years and because we have children neither has my husband. Going together is out of the question money wise and daycare wise. I do think he should have time to himself though. I am a full time student, mother and housewife, he is a full time deputy and part time student and dad. It is so difficult to make time for each other, kids and then for yourself. When you do have time you feel obligated to spend it with each other, and don’t get me wrong I am not saying we don’t enjoy each others company, I am saying where is the ME time. Everyone needs it, or you burn out. Our lives are filled with obligations and things we feel we should do. Take me time. Make room for yourself in your life. What is the point if you lose yourself in life. Make it a point to spend time on yourself! It does not need to be a vacation, but set time aside to take care of you. Whatever makes you happy and lets you truly recharge and collect your thoughts. Create an oasis for yourself and don’t feel guilty about spoiling yourself to some alone time. You deserve it and you will feel better later. Don’t regret the things you could have and should have done but didn’t because you put everything ahead of yourself. Let go of the guilt, there is no reason for it. Unplug from facebook, emails, phone calls, text messages and relax…You are worth it!
As always, I hope you enjoyed my blog and were able to take something away with you. Follow me on my journey and don’t forget to like and share! Please feel free to comment and share your thoughts with me even if you disagree 🙂 I love a good discussion.
2 thoughts on “Do you deserve a break?”
Ah! This is such a great reminder for people like me. I have hardly had a break from my kids in 8 years. So far, I don’t have feelings of burnout. But sometimes, I just want everyone to stop talking to me!
I recharge in the tiniest ways. I usually rise around 5:30 and either work or indulge in myself a little bit (it is my early morning solitude) . And once a week I play music in an 80-piece wind ensemble. That space is mine-all-mine!
But a resort? Ah, for now I can only imagine. I’m glad you were able to swing it. 🙂
I won’t lie, I didn’t pay for all of it. I got lucky. However we do need and deserve breaks, it doesn’t need to be a resort. I know the part about silence.. I am enjoying every second of silence I get haha. 80 piece wind ensemble … I’ll have to google that 😀